I can’t quite believe I’m sitting down to write my final Intentions post of 2016. I probably won’t do a full retrospective post about what the year was like for me but, to refer to it briefly, it’s been a mixed bags. Personally, I feel I have grown a lot and achieved several of my goals (especially regarding this blog!). However, on a larger scale, I have felt increasingly upset and hopeless about the state of the world, and that has been hard to shrug off.
November was a particularly tough month in that respect, what with the disastrous result of the U.S. election and the ever-worsening situation in Syria. I’ve felt pretty lost and unmotivated this month, which means I didn’t really stick to my Intentions to seek something beautiful in every day and take part in NaNoWriMo. There were a few moments where I felt present and conscious of good things in my life, and I managed to start a new writing project on the 30th (cutting it fine, as always), so at least there’s that.
So what’s in store for me in December?
| Moving forward without fear
CW Anxiety, mental health
Looking back on 2016, it’s been an up and down year when it comes to my issues with anxiety. I definitely made some headway – I am far less afraid of flying than I was, and even managed a trip to Sweden with almost no anxiety. However, there were moments when I found it extremely hard to handle my travel anxiety, to the point where I was taken over by fear. I’ve also found my obsessive and controlling tendencies worsening recently, which is not ideal, and I feel myself slowly rolling backwards down the hill, to a point where I don’t even consider doing things because of the anxiety they might trigger.
I want to move forward through this month acknowledging the fear and doing it anyway. I want to book to go on trips or to events regardless of the feelings of anxiety they set off. I want to at least try to do things that I enjoy but that scare me – like overnight jaunts with friends or evenings out – and deal with the consequences if they arise.
| To focus on learning
This is more of an ongoing Intention, but it’s something I would like to start now. Often, I feel as though I’m stagnating a little in terms of my long-term career and general life goals. I’d like to start actively working towards what I want, beginning by making some plans for my personal development next year. Oh, and by picking up my Swedish language learning again, too!
| To support causes I care about
To help counteract the feelings of hopelessness and despair I’ve been feeling about the dire state of the world, I want to galvanise myself into taking action on causes that are important to me, such as animal rights, reproductive and LGBTQ+ rights and humanitarian issues. This means attending more protests and vigils in the future when I can, as well as donating to more charities and generally staying informed. I am also interested in helping build the future I want to see, by giving to Kickstarters and offering support to women-led creative endeavours, something which means a great deal to me.
That’s kind of it for this month’s Intentions! What are you focussing on this month?